So Cold
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Artist:
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Breaking Benjamin
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Genre:
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Rock
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Decade:
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2000 - Present
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Title:
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So Cold
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Author:
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Sandra
Norval
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This band is one I've recently discovered. This song strikes a chord because I've been in a cold place not so long ago.I've spent years trying to get my life on track, alone. I had a bunch of friends who I thought I meant as much to as they meant to me. I was a bit wrong. At the time, sure, I was the one who they turned to when they needed someone to talk to. It didn't matter what time of day, night, whenever, I would drop everything and be there. After a while, inevitably everyone paired up, got married, had babies and so on. Except me. I was studying hard trying to carve out a career to be able to afford to buy a flat, have a car, do stuff. I realised I'd picked the wrong career path and had to spend longer studying to make the changes I have. I turned around and realised, no-one was there. To cut a long story short, I had a breakdown, New Year's Day 2009. I ended up laying on my bed for 48 hours, no food, no sleep, no friends, nothing. I was lucky though, I've seen how a breakdown affected others and I realised that I had to get up, go to work and get back into a routine, or give up and fade away. I went into work, told my boss, who is truly the best boss you could have, and was able to paint a picture to the outside world that everything was just dandy. Of course, it wasn't, I know that but that didn't mean anybody else had to. So Cold. Show me how it ends. Show me how defenceless you really are. There wasn't anyone to show it to until I started therapy. Anyway, that was then, nearly seven months later, I'm getting there, I'm carving out a new life, making new friends, am still in contact with the old ones, but know that they've moved on. I'm moving on too. This isn't a self pity story, this is a defiant one. Life goes in cycles and I know that I hit rock bottom for a while then kept on digging. Now, the only way is up (cue another musicbrick lol!) and I'm fighting, not looking back at the bad stuff, stronger for knowing that I went there and found my way back. And besides, I finally learnt how to embed the videos, see, it's getting better all the time! 8-D
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